Middle Age

Last night I attended a small gathering with some girls women I went to high school with. I felt uncomfortable most of the time, and left feeling strange. And no, it wasn’t the wine. (although I *was* thankful for the wine)

As I looked around the room, I realized that, other than age and the fact that we went to school together, we had almost nothing in common. Most of them had successful careers, and/or husbands with successful careers. They owned nice houses and decent cars. They had highlights and lowlights and wore sparkly jewelry and owned mom jeans.

Kids were another thing we had in common, but the commonality ended with the existence of said children. Their kids are in sports and have friends outside of school. Their kids are also much younger than my own. A fact that seems weird to me considering that we’re all 39-40 years old. One of them is pregnant now and due in a month. Having a newborn at 40?

We had little in common as far as interests and lifestyle. They like country and Christian and…John Mayer. I like bands most of them have never heard of. They go to Tastefully Simple and candle parties. I go to nerd conventions and dirty bars. To them, having 2 glasses of wine is something to giggle about and is borderline scandal. I’ve been (according to my Foursquare checkins) to bars 11 weeks in a row and got halfway through the Tour of Beers. Next year I go all the way!

Don’t even get me started on the swearing. I said, “fuck,” one time and 3 people turned to look at me.

To be clear, I’m not judging these ladies. To each her own. It all works for them. To me, they are the embodiment of middle age. I am just…not.

When I revealed to my one partner in crime in attendance how out of place and awkward I felt she said, “you shouldn’t. You were the most interesting person there.” I’m sure that was just her way of mothering me through it, but there you go.

As I approach the big 4-0 I don’t feel like I’m fighting it. I happily tell people my age. I don’t try to hide my grey hair. I do, however, wonder if it will ever catch up to me. That one day I’ll take out the nose ring, put away the Doc Martens, start listening to adult contemporary and leave the “cool mom” moniker behind.

Ye gods. I sure as hell hope not.

~ by midlifecrisisfun on January 4, 2012.

One Response to “Middle Age”

  1. I’m not sure how you could ever lose the “cool mom” title, even if you tried.

    I’ve been trying (really hard!) to lose my “cool dad” title for years, and even though my three – well, two out of the three at any rate – are more than happy to help me lose the crown, all of their friends keep finding the damned thing and plunking back upon my head 🙂

    And don’t worry about feeling “strange” – geography doesn’t mandate friendship (or kinship even). One of my best friends is a person I’ve never even met face-to-face while most of the folks I went to school with are now just distant memories even though they only live a few blocks over…

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